Wednesday Wisdom

Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better [wo]man.

~Benjamin Franklin

Happy New Year!

awareness vs. activism

art from www.beatplay.wordpress.com

I spend a lot of time learning, building awareness, about what's going on in the world. NPR, New York Times, blogosphere, books, documentaries, you name it. I am aware about a lot more issues than I am actively involved in changing.

But, it is awareness that leads to activism, which leads to change. Activism sounds big and intimidating, but it's really quite simple: taking action towards change, and urging others to do the same. If I had never learned about child slavery, I would have never become a fair-trade activist (and in turn, and anti-slavery activist). If I had never seen the massive inequalities children face in our society, I would never have become a social worker (which is a full-time activist). And so on, and so forth . . .

Of course, no one can be equally involved and passionate about ALL social issues. Some people give their lives to fight for clean water, some people fight for food and shelter for everyone, some people fight slavery, some fight loneliness. All of it is important, and I think each of us should find our passion and dive right in. But what about being integrated, and living our values even in the little things?

I think sometimes awareness feels like activism--watching a gripping movie that teaches us about some social ill makes us feel really smart and compassionate. And while that learning is important, it only matters in so far as it changes us, and in turn, changes society.

So while I spend all day working to make sure children who got an unfair hand have access to everything they need to grow up healthy, I also try to beactive in little ways, like reducing negative impact on our environment, or trying to use my money in ways that make the world better. I think I can call myself a Fair Trade Activist, even though it's not a full time gig. I also have a long way to go . . . I am trying to increase my impact with clean water for all and making my voice heard in a greater variety of justice issues, and I know I can do more. We can be everyday activists--in fact, it's among the most important things we can be! I firmly believe that the world will truly change when all of us make series of small choices that make life better for everyone.

Awareness, yes. But because it leads to activism, and because activism leads to change.

If you're looking to make a difference RIGHT NOW, check out http://www.domaconnection.org/ and give. They are 3 days away from a major opportunity, and they need you!

Wedneday Wisdom

I've been thinking this one over for awhile. It's tempting to work like crazy, making things happen, manipulating situations into perceived success. When dealing with people, though, goodness blossoms at its own time. Christmas teaches that lesson well: the world was a mess, so God planted a teeny, tiny seed in a woman and allowed it to grow. And that is what saved the world.

"Adopt the pace of nature; her secret is patience."

--Ralph Waldo Emerson

Merry Christmas!

Double your money! Act now! Operators are standing by!

If you're looking for an alternative Christmas idea, or an organization to give your year-end tax-deductable donation, or if your heart has been stirred by the horrors of human trafficking and the degradation of America's sex industry, or if you want an opportunity to change a woman's life, then I strongly urge you to check out Doma International!

Doma has an opportunity to earn $54,000 before the end of 2010--on condition that they raise $27,000 themselves. If they raise $27,000, a generous donor will DOUBLE it to $54,000! If they raise $26,500, then no match.If you've ever considered giving to Doma, even giving $10, $100, $1,000, or $10,000, now is the time!

With these funds, Doma will be developing their Bloom! house for women who are exiting prostitution and the pain that goes with it, growing firmer roots and reaching toward the sun. The program will provide victim support services in conjunction with the courts and substance abuse recovery. The women learn basic life skills, build healthy relationships, and engage in nurturing activities, all while being surrounded with strong women who care about them and their futures. This program is a part of Project Green Light, seeking to end human trafficking in Ohio, the United States, and the world.

Could this be your first step (or next step) in the modern abolitionist movement?

Could this be your chance to bring this situation to the attention of someone (or some organization) who can make this matching grant a reality?

Do you have questions about prostitution, human trafficking, or Doma?

You can contact me. Or contact Julie Clark, CEO of Doma, Daniel, development director, or Tom English, COO. Or if you're ready to give, head on over to Doma's secure giving site hosted by eTapestry and give to your heart's content.

Could you please share this information with friends, family, and organizations through emails, reposts, links, and even phone calls?

Please don't wait, we only have until December 31, 2010!!

And THANK YOU for your care and concern for women and children, at home and beyond!

Time Flies

I definitely thought I'd be blogging more in Advent.

And I definitely discovered that the spirit of Advent and Christmas is more present in our home when we spend less time with a computer in our laps.

Living the meaning of Advent comes easier some days than others. And our calendar idea will undergo some tweaking next year, as delivering suprise cookies works better on some days than others, for example. But it's been a fun adventure and a joy, living mindfully this season and focusing on what matters. We've been reading lots of St Francis, spending good time with good people, and opening our eyes to new opportunities. I thought I'd be blogging more, but I guess there are brighter and warmer things for me to do this season. I'm OK with that. :)

Wednesday Wisdom

Christmas means nostalgia. For the children I work with, it means memories and missing people you love with all your heart. For so many people, it stings, as they are more alone than they dreamed they would be.

Maybe we need to take a bit more care of ourselves during this holiday season, to learn from our feelings and grow into stronger, more sensitive people. And most definitely, we need to look around and extend some warmth, maybe open our homes, to someone who is feeling alone.

"Christmas is a time when you get homesick--even when you're home."
-Carol Nelson

Linus and Lucy

Linus is concerned that Christmas has gone too commercial. Lucy is just glad that Christmas means lots of presents for pretty girls. Argh! I feel like Linus in a Lucy world.

It is so, so hard to find gifts that fit our values, fit our budgets, and delight the people we love. After years of shopping for gifts that make wise use of resources and support human dignity (not slavery), we feel like we have maxed out Global Gifts, Fair Indigo, and the like. We're trying Global Girlfriend. We're trying Uncommon Goods, though I am not convinced these products are produced fairly. When we buy mainstream gifts, we try to buy smart, using Green America's Responsible Shopper. But the sad truth is, there is a limited supply of items that feel good for us to buy and give.

Further, I have never enjoyed giving gifts just to say I have given a gift. I want to give something meaningful, useful, fun, worthwhile. The honest truth is that for most people on my list, they have PLENTY. A feast of more than enough. It is hard to find an item that cuts through the accumulation of stuff to be a meaningful gift.

What to do? We have tried to give gifts of presence, not just presents. Tickets, time together, etc. Sometimes that works better than others. I would love to stick to what a lovely woman I know calls the secondhand, handmade, fairtrade rule, but sometimes I shy away because I'm not sure how it would be received. Or what about contributing to college funds for the busy kids who seem to have everything?

We're still pondering, but we're running out of time! What about you? How do you go about selecting a lovely Christmas gift?

Wednesday Wisdom

Remember my perfectionism compulsion? Who knows why I'm this way, but it's taken me 31 years to get here so I have some grace for myself if I haven't quite mastered it yet. A fresh perspective, at least for me, and a beautiful relief and challenge:

"A [woman] who fails well is greater than one who succeeds badly. One who is content in what [she] has, and who accepts the fact that [she] inevitably misses very much in life, is far better off than one who has much more but who worries about all [she] may be missing. For we cannot make the best of what we are, if our hearts are always divided between what we are and what we are not." --Thomas Merton

Wednesday Wisdom

I find wisdom in so many places. I read it and hear it every day, from friends, family and famous people. Looks like Wednesdays will be a weekly homage to the wisdom I gather throughout the week. As we enter Advent, I am striving to keep the spirit of the season alive in every moment of even the bleakest day. Thus,

"It is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air."
--W. T. Ellis

empathy overload

I've always been an empathetic person. It's a strength and a weakness, as many things are. As a kid, I cried over worms getting eaten by birds. They just seemed so small and so scared; it wasn't their fault they were in the wrong place at the wrong time. And what about their families!? And so forth.

Empathy can be a beautiful thing. And if run wild, it can be a disaster.

I think the busy-ness of working multiple jobs and plowing through school numbed me a bit over the past few years. I had missed my wild and alive feelings and looked forward to being myself again. Be careful what you wish for . . .

I love my job, and I wouldn't trade it. Sometimes I am fully functioning and effective, and my empathetic tendencies serve my clients in the best way. I can see from their perspective, but step back and help them find effective ways to address their circumstances without feeling it personally. Many times, I can do that at work, but the feelings come home with me and linger. Sometimes, I am emotionally raw, and the enormity of everyone's feelings begins to overwhelm me. I'm there now.

So what do I do?

This is why Just Living in the little things is so important to me. I have been learning, and am still learning, that there is only so much of me to go around. I did not come to save the world, just to breathe a little warmth into my corner of it. If I am going to be who I was created to be, I have to nurture light and health for myself so I can share it with the world.

This week, I have my last retreat with The Journey, which came at a perfect time. I have spent a year with 19 other youth workers from all over Indiana as we seek to grow into our best selves, personally and professionally, for the sake of the youth we serve. I've learned more about nurturing my inner light this year than I have in my previous 30 (despite hearty efforts by my parents to help me keep my cool). I'm still struggling, and there will always be times when a child's horrifying experiences weigh on my soul. But they need me to continue to grow, and to keep myself strong, because for some of them I am among the only strength they can see.

So, I'm running away for a few days and I plan to return fresh, strong, and alive. I hope and pray the same for all of you.

Advent!

Advent is here! This year, our traditional purple and pink candles at church were traded for blue, representing the hope of Christmas. That works for me.

This year, we are celebrating Advent a bit differently. Along with readings and reflection, we are filling all of our senses with holiday spirit and seeking to live mindfully this time of year. We're replacing the hustle and bustle with the scent of pine and cinnamon, time with friends and family, and challenges to extend hope and love a little further this year.

So, instead of the typical advent calendar with a chocolate treat inside (which you can get fair trade from Divine), we have a reusable calendar we found on Etsy. It's so clever! The artist covered matchboxes with beautiful paper and numbered them, then added magnets. It's on our fridge for now, but eventually we will find a beautiful way to display the calendar.


We listed ways to celebrate together and share the season with others: Invite a guest for cookies and cocoa. Share some warm clothes. Learn a new holiday carol. Spend some time looking at the stars. We placed a slip inside each box, and every morning we will have a new way to celebrate.

We're excited! I'll share throughout the season what comes of our advent experiment. Our hope is that not only will the season fill our hearts and minds in a new way, but that we will be able to share hope and light with everyone around us this season.

What about you? How do you celebrate Advent? What are your traditions for preparing for Christmas?

I really want to know!

grateful . . .

. . . for the striped cat curled up in my lap and his fluffy brother at my side

. . . for the steaming, fragrant cup of tea prepared with love by my kindhearted husband

. . . for the work that pays the bills and feeds my soul

. . . for green grass and crunchy leaves

. . . for the redemptive powers of love and grace

. . . for moments of beauty and truth

. . . for friends who lighten my spirit and make me a better person

. . . for family who loves, loves, loves

. . . for my husband, lifelong love, and friend, who nurtures my heart and brings so much joy

. . . for surprises and new beginnings

. . . for challenges, and for the strength to see them through

. . . for growth and change

. . . for a path directed by wisdom higher than mine

. . . for daydreams and memories

. . . for life and breath and time

" . . . If the only prayer you say in your life is 'thank you,' that would suffice."
--Meister Eckhart

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you! May your day overflow with moments of gratitude and joy.

Consumption Check-Up

Remember our consumerism fast? The effects are still lingering. It's pretty enjoyable. I had a couple of rough patches, like really wanting to use the WiFi at a coffee spot downtown but feeling guilty for going in but not buying. I called my husband so he could talk me down, and it worked. I sat in my car and typed. But overall, it was nice to remind ourselves to spend our time and money on things that really matter. We are more mindful of how we shop and how our purchases affect others. And really, we just don't miss shopping.

With Advent starting Sunday, we are planning to celebrate our holiday season intentionally. That means more people, more reflection, more sights, sounds, and smells, more time, and less stuff--and it begins now. You won't see us shopping on Black Friday! Some stores are opening Thursday, for pity's sake. I am all for workers getting holiday pay if they want it, and everyone agrees that jobs are good in this climate, I just feel for the workers sacrificing their rest, sanity, and family time. I know lots of people who love Black Friday shopping and use it as a family ritual, too, and that can be a good thing. I just wonder if it's gotten out of hand . . . people hurt each other, people have even died, just over saving a few dollars to buy something they might have done without. It's just not something we can participate in and still enjoy our day.

So this Friday, we will continue our consumerism fast. We'll rest, exercise, probably work (that's another post for another day--but I'm doing better!), and enjoy each other. Our family ritual is to put the Christmas decorations up, break out our favorite Christmas music, make a big meal, and set the tone for our holiday season.

What about you? How do you celebrate this famed day after Thanksgiving?

The Weapon We Have is Love

"Did you ever wish that Harry Potter was real? Well it kind of is."



How much do I love that there are other Harry Potter fans who deeply feel the book's resonance with social justice issues? Check out the Harry Potter Alliance, a group of fans who seeks to defeat the dark arts in our world. Their first task: slave-free chocolate. Julie Clawson spells it out better than I ever could (as she often does--remember how much I love Everyday Justice?), and they are slated for NPR's Morning Edition tomorrow. I am so excited at the prospect of bringing this message to a mainstream pop culture audience, and I'm inspired by the young people who have taken it to heart. Cheers to HPA!

No More Dirty Looks

For the last 6 years or so, natural and homemade personal care products have been the norm around here. Sadly, I found myself slowly compromising my standards for the sake of quality or convenience, thinking my lungs can probably handle a little bit of polymer (read:plastic!) from my hairspray . . . things like that. It was time for a reality check. Enter Siobhan and Alexandra from No More Dirty Looks.

Loved it! The book is so informative and readable--much more so than others I've read on the topic. I'm so glad Cara sent it my way. After tearing through my library copy, I had to buy it (secondhand, of course). It works like a handbook, with lists of dangerous ingredients as well as safer products they have tried. These ladies care about looking polished and professional, but not at the sake of their personal well-being (or negative effects on factory workers and the environment). I love that Alexandra has hair just like mine--it makes the information all the more valuable!

For example, did you know you can make hair gel out of aloe and hairspray out of lemons, water, and vodka? Did you know baking soda makes a refreshing facial scrub and coconut oil a soothing body moisturiser? Did you know that you shouldn't wash your hair daily and should only use soap sparingly?

If you're interested in caring for yourself and your planet, if you're interested in avoiding cancers, endocrine disruption, respiratory issues, or other yucky ailments, if you'd like to prevent oil spills, and if you'd like to look cute while doing it, I highly recommend this book. I've just ordered my first products on their recommendation: John Masters Sunscreen and La Vanilla fragrance. I'll keep you posted!

My Ongoing Existential Dilemma

On the way back from a lovely night away, Ben and I stopped at an icky outlet mall. We don't love shopping or anything, but we try to use sales and coupons to get some good deals for basics and wardrobe updates a couple times a year. We struggle with knowing where to shop to cause the least harm, and sites like Green America and Chain Store Reaction help us make some choices. (For example, Gap stores, which include Old Navy, Athleta, and Banana Republic, have put significant effort into slavery issues. They are not perfect, but they are responding.)

Almost every time I shop at a typical retail store, I freak out a little bit. Sitting in the parking lot Saturday, with a bag of stuff in my lap, our engine idling with dozens of other vehicles trying to escape the shrine to commerce, I got a sick feeling. The whole process is in stark contrast with what I truly value. All of those people spending all of that time chasing stuff! It makes my stomach hurt. I get the angst. There is a part of me that enjoys the aesthetics of dressing in a way that reflects my style, and part of me finds it restorative to take care of myself in a way that keeps my temple shiny. But most of me couldn't care less!

This inevitably brought us to the Christmas conversation. We love, love, love the people on our gift list, but every last one of them has more than enough stuff! We have tried different approaches in the past: donations in people's honor, gifts that support causes, gifts of time and presence. How can we share Christmas in a way that both honors our loved ones and is consistent with our values of peace and justice?

I think we're going to try some new things this year. It takes some creativity to participate in American holiday culture without elevating stuff and busy-ness above the essence of the holidays. Advent is coming. This year, the Clarks are considering our own version of the Advent Conspiracy and Sojourner's Peace and Justice Christmas--not just a smidge, but full-on. Throughout Advent, I'll be blogging our thoughts, discoveries, experiments, and even failings at celebrating the essence of Christmas, and nothing more. I hope you will join us!

sharing some love

What do you think of the new design? I love it! It's so fun to blog in a space that reflects my personal style. Thanks so much to Lara at Designer Blogs for her patience and care in creating my birthday present blog design. Should you ever need a designer, I highly recommend them!

Protecting our Children

Prostitution is one of those topics that causes most people to bristle. There's an image that goes with prostitution, and it's usually of a desperate woman trying to make a dollar, sometimes to feed her family, sometimes for a glamorous life, often for drugs. The word 'pimp' has somehow become a hip verb and adjective.

But what if you knew that the average age of entry into prostitution in this country is 12-14? That real pimps are often slick manipulaters who lure vulnerable girls into debt, fear, drug addiction so they can make a buck by renting them out to abusive "customers"? That the young women are held in terrifying circumstances, unable to leave? That many pimps are women? What if you realized that an adult having sex with a minor is a crime, but in many places, if the minor receives money (regardless of who it goes to), the minor becomes the criminal?

Don't believe me? CNN just yesterday busted a story about a huge child prostitution crackdown IN THE UNITED STATES. 884 arrests, 99 of them pimps. 69 children recovered. And that's just one 3-day raid in places like Seattle, Nashville, Detroit.

This ring in particular has been going on for over 10 years. Many of the arrests were of adult prostitutes. How many of those, do you think, were trapped in this lifestyle as children? The day they turn 18, they go from victims (if recognized as victims at all) to criminals.

As long as there are people who will pay to abuse women and children, there will be people who will exploit them to make some money. As long as society turns a blind eye to these horrifying events, they will continue.



So what do we do? Learn as much as we can! Tell our lawmakers that we won't allow people to buy and sell our children while our children pay with their lives. Organizations such as the Polaris Project, Shared Hope, and Free the Slaves are great places to start. Doma International educates communities on the harsh realities of the sex industry. I've worked with them in Ohio, and I'd love to do the same here in Indianapolis. I'm always looking for potential partners. Who's with me? If you, your church, or your communities are interested in learning more about fighting domestic sex trafficking of children, visit http://www.domaconnection.org/ or drop me a note. It's up to us to protect our children.

Perspective

Photo from www.rallytorestoresanity.com

Reading these words moves me to gratitude and inspires me to action. So many people need food, clothing, shelter, health, safety, and education! The way we live our lives can make things happen. This is the essence of just living. What are your thoughts when you read this? What can we be doing together?

Fall, Food, and Family

After a few too many work-filled weekends, this weekend was dedicated to enjoying friends and family. I walked a half marathon Saturday with some great friends in the crisp (ok, COLD!) fall air, then hosted my in-laws for the weekend. I am blessed and thankful they are in my family! Sunday, our house was full as my grandmothers, parents, and friends who are like family joined us. Even though I am now home sick without a voice, I feel so much more alive than I would have if I worked all weekend!


We celebrated fall with yummy roasted vegetables and too much dessert. My grandma's granny smith apples were featured players in a homemade apple butter.

5 1/2 c apples, peeled and finely chopped (you can't beat home-grown granny smith!)
2 c sugar*
2 tsp ground cinnamon*
1/4 tsp ground cloves*
1/4 tsp salt

Throw everything in a slow cooker & cover. Cook on high for an hour, low for 9-11 hours, and then uncovered for another hour. Whisk if you want it smoother. That's it! It freezes great, and it is sooo yummy!

*Ideally, you would find fair trade sugar and spices, but I'm sad to say I have been struggling to find them readily available. Any tips, please let me know!

Part of walking humbly, for me, is taking the time to connect to the people I love and honor my roots. In my family, that is done through quality time together and food prepared with care and love. This feeds my soul and makes me a stronger person, all-around--and it allows me to do the same for beautiful people who have given so much in their lives. That is good for me, my family, the children and families I serve, and the world. Thank you to all of the wonderful people who made my weekend!

treating the consumption

It's time for a consumerism fast around here.

A few times, for Lent, we've given up consumerism. We combined trips and used our bikes and the bus more. We remembered to conserve water, gas, and electricity. We watched less TV. We cooked at home and composted and recycled any waste. We donated items we don't need and found new uses for old objects. If we didn't need it, we didn't buy it. Period. Material needs are limited to nutritious food and gasoline to go to work and toilet paper and the like. We make a few mindful purchases, buying fair trade, recycled, organic, and local when we can. The rest, as my husband says, is all gonna burn in the end. We already have more than enough. By deflecting attention from keeping up with our consumerist culture, we have been able to turn our attention to what really matters.

Right now, we're adjusting to new schedules and still catching up from our trip. When we're stressed, easy fixes often overtake wiser, more mindful choices. So, like we do during Lent, we're hitting the reset button and returning attention to our core values.

Are we crazy consumers like some people out there? No. But do we use more than we need? Often. We're American, it's to be expected.

It might seem a little off-base that so many of the links and topics on Just Living concern products and shopping. This is supposed to be about living simply and changing the world in small ways! The fact is, we live in a consumerist culture. Most of us shop way too much, and so often, convenience wins the day, at the expense of justice for so many people. What we buy impacts neighborhoods, resources, health, safety, and dignity for so many people. I can't call myself a justice-minded person if I shop blindly. In a consumerist culture, money is king. Companies will listen to our spending more than they listen to our words. I really believe that if our culture shifts into one of gratitude for what we have instead of constant need to upgrade and acquire more, things will start to change.

While our little week of a consumerism fast may be small, it will impact:

-the environment, as we will produce less waste and manufacturing byproducts while consuming fewer resources; this in turn impacts people around the world
-worker's rights, as we avoid purchasing items made on the backs of exploited people
-our bank account, as we eliminate wasteful spending
-our thinking, as we remember to live with less and address inconveniences creatively
-our spirits, as we feel lighter and freer and have more to give to others

So, here we go again! Anyone care to join us? We'd love to hear your ideas.

And Happy Halloween!

Confessions

For all my planning, hoping, and writing, I'm not always so great at maintaining the balance I strive for. We're in transition right now, finally getting used to my having a full-time job with just one side gig (instead of multiple part-time jobs plus school). I'm still working out how to do my job well, care for our Russian kids, enjoy my husband and home life, and spend time with my friends and family. In that mix, I don't always take good care of myself. I've been to yoga about once a week, but I have yet to schedule that first massage. My chest is growing tight again . . . grrrrr. Always learning, right? So this week is about discipline, healthy boundaries, and prioritizing. Problem is, it's hard to prioritize when everything is important and inviting! That's why I need to make space for silence; it helps me find the truth and stay grounded. I hope to have scheduled my massage by the end of this week, and I plan to have the computer off (that means NO MORE working on cases or Russia stuff) by 10:00 every night this week. Will I do it? We'll find out . . . in the meantime, encouragement welcome! I'm looking at the blessings I have and seeking to live justly and generously even among the chaos. I am so thankful to surround this busy week with a great weekend with family (hospitable and gracious in-laws, super cute and cuddly nieces and nephews, and wonderful beyond words grandparents) and a fun get-together coming up this weekend. In between, I hope that all of us have space to be who we were made to be and eyes open to all ways we can brighten the world, big and small.

The Joys of Seasonal Eating

We have been LOVING our Green BEAN bin this fall. Squash of all kinds, beets, yams, and apples, all local and mostly organic. We've been revelling in the season! Roasted beets and butternut squash with cheesy polenta = comfort on a plate. Our last scrumptious creation was Roasted Pumpkin-Apple Soup.

We served it with toasted cheddar and arugula sandwiches on Scholar's Inn wheat. We used walnuts, because that's what we had, and added a splash of brandy. SO GOOD! Next fall comfort food: my famous (or should I say infamous?) veggie chili!

What do you love to make in the fall? I'm feeling adventurous, it's time for new fall recipe ideas!

VOTE!

A wise woman I know reminds the youth she works with that not everyone gets to vote. Yes, our process is flawed. Yes, our choices can be frustrating. But how do we expect anything to get any better by just sitting and complaining!



Lee Hamilton was on Diane Rehm today and reminded listeners that freedom brings responsibility. He also stated that a politician's job is to build consensus towards solutions, not to tear each other apart. I think voters should do the same thing! Let candidates know your thoughts. Weigh concerns, weigh options for solutions, listen to all sides, and make an informed, rational choice. VOTE! And after we vote, we should pitch in and get involved in our communities, making them stronger from the roots.

There are still two weeks to research candidates. For starters, Indiana voters can use the Indianapolis Star's handy voter guide to help us figure out who is running in our districts. But that's just a starting point--it's a great idea to do some research and see what the candidates are saying in their own words (and consider the source of other information). You can even vote early.

And be bold! Don't be afraid! Or as someone said last election cycle, vote your hopes and not your fears.

Here's my chance to sneak in a plug for a lovable little cartoon--a lighthearted look at what can happen when we vote in fear. And please, remember to Vote, Vote, Vote!

Sweat-free Shopping

Clothing is one of those American entitlements. Most of us have a disgusting amount of perfectly fine clothes, yet find reasons every year to buy more because we "need" certain items. I'm guilty of it. Our culture does an excellent job of convincing us we need certain pieces to look complete, put-together, professional--every woman "needs" pumps and a little black dress, for example.

I call BS. Most of my clients get by without any of the stuff many of us think we need. And buying all that junk contributes to waste in landfills, dangerous chemicals in our ground, air, and water, and exploitation of people at home and abroad. I'm sad to say that sweatshops and forced labor are alive and well.

Did you know there are more slaves alive today than there were when slavery was legal? How is this possible? Because demand for cheap crap outpaces demand for human dignity. People are making money off of it--OUR money.

Well, that's just one reason.

Among the super-important things we can do to stop slavery is to stop the demand for slave-produced goods. Clothing is a main culprit. While factories around the world can provide much-needed income for families, they can also destroy lives. We have to pay attention to what we buy. All the activism in the world won't change lives if we then turn around and use our hard-earned money to support the slavery we hate.

Buying second hand is a GREAT way to reduce demand for new slave-produced goods. The stuff already exists, is often of good quality, and looks better in a closet than it does in a landfull.

Buying fair trade is a great option as well. There are so many good places to buy fair trade gifts, all you have to do is google. For clothing, try Fair Indigo. It's not the most fashion-forward, but that's what vintage stores are for. Fair Indigo has great basic pieces with good cut and good quality. There's a HUGE sale right now--cashmere for $25! Sizes for ladies run a bit large, so keep that in mind.

To find out which manufacturers and retailers even care how their factories are run, check out Chain Store Reaction.
Better yet, send them a note and let them know you care. To find out what more you can do to end slavery in our time, visit Free the Slaves or Green America's Guide to Ending Sweatshops.

[Factory labor is just one type of modern slavery. To learn more about what you can do to end sex slavery in the US, visit Doma International.]

Squeaky Clean

When people talk about developing renewable energy, it's often about replacing oil-based fuel with something else. Most everyone can agree the oil spill this summer was not ok (understatement of the century), and most everyone would like to keep it from happening again. But it's not only gas that contributes to our need for oil! It's plastic, cleaning products, and even personal care products we use every day. What we purchase directly impacts demand for cheap oil, which directly impacts the length to which companies will go to get it.

Petroleum-based products are just part of the problem with cleaning products. These chemicals can contain harmful odors; some can make us sick if they touch our skin. I've always wondered what we'll come to learn about these products in the future--don't forget, Coca-Cola truly used to contain cocaine! Sometimes it takes awhile to understand the long-term effect of certain chemicals. For those reasons, and many others, we opt for natural cleaning products like the ones found at Ecos. There are all kinds of options out there! Our favorites are formulas we can make ourselves with ingredients like lemon juice, vinegar, and baking soda.

Be careful, though, as vinegar can corrode certain enamels (as we've sadly learned).

What natural cleaning solutions work well for you? What do you recommend to avoid?

Nostalgia

We had a great weekend. Big family party on Saturday--one of my little cousins got married. Sniff! She is so beautiful, and we are so happy for both of them!



I am blessed with a big, loving family. I'm the oldest of all of my 11 cousins (on my dad's side). We had a great time giggling at family quirks, laughing over family memories and making new ones. We FINALLY got a picture of all the cousins! Well, almost all. The new groom didn't make it into the picture, but he'll pay his dues in time. :) And another cousin was celebrating her anniversary, so she wasn't there. We missed her and her family. And today, I'm hanging out with my husband and my parents in honor of the other missing cousin, my little bro who should have been 28 today.



Wistful fall days bring lots of memories and lots of feelings. Today is a day for family; everything else can wait until tomorrow.

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."
--Dr. Seuss

Going Home

I deal with the hard stuff of life on a daily basis at work and in other commitments. As much as I want to continue to learn about what's going on in the world, I have found myself drawn more and more to lighthearted entertainment. I can only tolerate so much complete and total fluff, so I find myself drawn frequently to memoir. I love to read something lighthearted, honest, heartfelt, and meaningful that offers some perspective from someone else's view while not taking itself to seriously.

In Russia, I read Mennonite in a Little Black Dress: A Memoir of Going Home.
I haven't laughed that hard in ages! Weaved with the hard truths of her adult life, Rhoda Janzen reflects on the life she's left and the life she's chosen with grace and humor. Her perspective on faith is honest and, at least for me, relatable. And her family is hilarious! If you are a person of faith/classical musician and can make it through the Classical Loon section without laughing yourself into tears, I don't know what else to offer. This book is highly recommended!

Blood Chocolate

I am a big fan of chocolate--specifically 72%, high-quality dark. The sad, ugly truth about chocolate is that most of it--especially the cheap stuff--comes at a great expense. Child labor, forced slavery, kidnapping and human trafficking, dangerous working conditions, long hours, and extremely low wages are just part of what keeps our chocolate chips and candy bars affordable.

Photo from Green America

No one I know thinks it is OK to exploit children for a profit, and yet the chocolate industry is thriving on this model. Some big companies are responding to consumer pressure and are reworking their policies. Others have a long way to go.

So what can we do? We strive to buy only fair trade chocolate, which ensures safe and equitable working conditions through the supply chain. You can look for the fair trade label. Endangered Species chocolate is ethically sourced and donates a percentage back to nurture the environments where chocolate grows.

We can tell everyone we know the real story behind chocolate. We can tell bakeries, coffee shops, and grocery stores that we care about the people who provide chocolate for us, and that we will support businesses who do the same. Most importantly, we can continue to campaign the big chocolate companies that it's time to change. We can no longer support harmful pracitices for the sake of a little indulgence.

Fair trade isn't perfect, and these are small steps to solve a big problem, but it's a start. What do you think? What do we need to do to ensure our free market system is also ethical? How can we elevate human dignity over the demand for cheap goods?

Releasing and Accepting

I'm decently OK at releasing and accepting things that are beyond my control--like Terrell Pryor's apparent injury unfolding during this OSU game. Ugh. But my perfectionistic tendencies sometimes keep me holding tightly to goals and responsibilities that have really very little to do with my daily happiness or positive impact on the world.



I've been working on accepting adequate when adequate will do, with limited success. I can't tell you how many late nights my husband has endured because I want to try just one more thing or I don't quite like what I've done so far. It's a family trait, I think, and it comes from a good place. I really like doing good work! I really like learning the best way to do things and taking the time to do things right. I enjoy the process. But no one can do everything. There are times when my approach serves the common good and times when it causes more harm.

Example: I registered for a November half marathon. I've run 3 half marathons and I thought it was about time to do another. My strongest running trait is mental strength for distances, so it seems like I should be running distances. But, I don't really like running--at least, not enough to devote the hours required for half marathon training. Nonetheless, I returned from Russia determine to train for the half in just 6 weeks.

My husband patiently waited for me to realize that is pretty stupid.

I'm no super-athlete, but I enjoy staying in shape. I love yoga. I like kick-boxing. I like walks, I like the occasional short run. I like strength training, I like pilates. I have a really, really hard time gearing up for a long training run. I spend the whole time thinking of what else I could be doing, and I sacrifice my Saturday yoga to run. Not to mention the risk of overtraining injury, since it's been awhile since I've trained regularly.

So why the heck should I train so hard? I am going to run the 5k instead, and I am going to enjoy it. I am releasing my self-imposed obligation to the half-marathon and accepting that it's OK to be a casual runner.

Seems small, I know. But it's helping me enjoy the day-to-day and live in the moment, which makes me a better person for the people around me. And the same principle applies to bigger things, like my work with my clients or my kiddos in Russia. I can impact global injustice and individual healing, but so much of it is beyond my control. Releasing the burden and accepting my role frees me to love well without fear. I'm still learning, but I accept that. :)

Mmmmassage

I've been over-stressing my body for years, I am sad to say. Last year, it responded by diminishing my breathing ability to less than 80%. Once my doctor helped me get that under control, my heart rate increased. Basically, my body was over-producing stress hormones (cortisol, adrenaline, etc) at such a high rate that I could no longer process them. The stress I chose to live in was manifesting in my body as fight or flight response, but I didn't need to do either! The excess energy translated into anxiety. ICK.

So, my body was doing what my mind would not: demanding I take better care of myself. This year has been a journey in just that. It's ridiculous, but I had to get over the idea that taking care of myself is selfish. By reframing being my best self as a job responsibility, I started prioritizing things like sleep, fun, and relaxation. I am getting glimpses of myself as a better person, and I like it.

At this point, any non-pharmaceutical intervention that lowers cortisol is a worthy investment. I am trying different approaches to see what works well for me. I've started practicing yoga again, reading for fun, and spending more time at home. I've even been to the spa twice in the last year--which more than doubles my previous number of visits! A good friend (who's a genius nutrition scientist) recently suggested regular massage. It sounds like such a luxury, and quite honestly, for many people it is. But health and wellness should not be luxuries! Massage is good for my mind, body, and spirit, and recent studies have proven its ability to lower cortisol. I am definitely willing to try it!

I still feel a need to justify this as a necessary medical intervention. But really, why should I? Last I checked, taking a Sabbath is in the top tier of the 10 commandments. It's required! And for me, taking time to myself and releasing muscle tension feeds my soul. Really, taking care of myself is teaching me about walking humbly. By accepting support and nurturing from others, I am becoming stronger. And I am so thankful!

Blood Cell Phones

Ok, Ben and I both have really ancient cell phones. We are mocked regularly. Obviously, we really don't care. There are a few reasons for our exceedingly unhip phones, which include the following:

a) Neither of us want to be chased constantly by our email or the internet, thus no smart phone

b) We have better things to spend our hard-earned money on than fancy phones and data plans

c) We just aren't that interested in electronics

d) We are humiliated and disgusted at the sourcing for materials for phones

The answer is e) all of the above.

Now, the time has come to shop for a new cell phone. The one I use currently is over 5 years old and waaaaaay past its prime--not good when my work depends on it. While I am miffed at the whole concept of planned obsolescence--why not make phones that are designed to last for those of us not into the latest and greatest?--I am far more disturbed at the thought that my purchase of electronics contributes to unspeakable atrocities half a world away.

What's a woman to do? There are no electronics on our market labeled conflict-free. And yet, for middle-class professionals, our culture essentially demands that we use them.

I am fully aware of my option to go ascetic. (In the eyes of some of my peers, using my apparently ancient phone qualifies.) But that would require me to change careers, finding a place where my clients don't need 24-hour access and I don't have to use a computer to document every interaction. I could turn a blind eye and buy a new phone anyway--we all know that individual boycotts have very little effect on the big picture.

Or, I could get creative. I could let my phone company know I am disgusted at my options (and I plan to!). And I can buy refurbished. Ok, the blood minerals are already in there, and that is not OK with me. But I don't increase demand for these products; in fact, my purchase will indicate that reusing resources and minimizing new production is important to me. And my letter will connect that to the need for ethically sourced minerals.

It's small, maybe, and plenty of people will tell me I am overthinking. I just can't imagine the women and children who endure rape and torture at the hands of the people selling the minerals think it is all worth it, so long as the thirty-something social worker in Indiana gets a cell phone.

Inspiration

If I could recommend one book on faith and social justice, it would be Everyday Justice by Julie Clawson. I wish I wrote it, and I am so thankful she did! It touches on justice issues that truly intersect with our lives daily and gives clear, meaningful information on why all of us should care. The writing is compelling and free of judgment, and the tips are practical and easily applied to daily life (for those of us in middle class US culture).

This book, among other things, inspired this blog. I hope my musings on discoveries, experiments, progress, and failures will help us all better understand how we can make daily choices which impact our world for the better. And I hope everyone I know reads Everyday Justice!!!

Simple Innovations

Thanks to DVR, Ben and watched a little Letterman the other night and saw President Clinton. He was talking about how many jobs we could create by building green energy and innovations. Simple example: put people to work whitewashing tar roofs in big cities. It's cheaper than roof gardens (which are better) but still saves a lot of energy and money for the building owner. He also believes that our country's best shot at economic recovery is building renewable energy sources on our own soil. It all made so much sense! But how do we prioritize real solutions and pragmatic progress when the political climate is so toxic?

We're registered independent. We like ideas that work.

Maybe Jon Stewart's Rally to Restore Sanity will change the tide of election season. It's hard to make progress when we're too busy fighting.

Wishful thinking? Maybe. I guess that conversation has been going for awhile.

Just Eating

After 10 days of eating potatoes and flour in Russia, Ben and I decided to be quite purposeful about what we eat this week. Enter Clean Eating Magazine.



We decided to stick pretty closely to their 7 day eating plan. We generally eat pretty well, but it never hurts to have some expert help.

Can I just say . . . eating well is expensive!

As a kid, everything we had was hard-earned. I learned the value of penny-pinching by necessity, not choice. We shopped smart and ate smart. We gardened all summer and canned in the fall. We did pretty well, considering, but I know that my mom would have rather had some wiggle room for more food opportunity--trading the tuna mac for more vegetables, for example. (My mom, to this day, does not enjoy tuna mac.)

As an adult, I feel strangely settled into the middle class. Penny pinching is a wise choice, but it is a choice. We pinch when we can, and we've found value in paying more for just food. We usually get our produce from Green BEAN Delivery, meaning our local and organic produce is priced a touch lower than at the grocery, and it's conveniently delivered to our door. While it costs more than conventional produce, we feel it is worth it to buy food that is better for the environment, better for the people who grow and handle it, has less distance to travel, supports local agro-business, and ultimately tastes better and is better for us.

Since we were gone for 10 days, the cupboards were bare and we had to hit the grocery store. We spent 50% more than we normally do. Granted, we were stocking up, but it was painful. My childhood taught me many ways I could have saved $$ at the grocery. Organic soymilk is twice as expensive as conventional cow's milk. Organic spinach is over 4 times as expensive as conventional iceburg lettuce. Conventional eggs are half the price of eggs from cage-free, vegetarian fed hens. You get the picture.

I don't fault consumers for pinching pennies, especially in these economic times. Our food system has made cheap, abundant food mainstream--and even so, people are struggling. But food producers and suppliers (and I'm talking about top levels here) have been cashing in at our expense. Aside from issues of sustainability, how did it come to be that overprocessed, lower-nutrient foods are the norm? Why is it cheaper to eat yellow cake from a box than to eat a spinach salad? Why should it be a luxury to eat well?

Ben and I struggle with this as we weigh the cost of conventional vs. local, organic dairy. It hurts to pay more, and sometimes we go for cheap. But we can afford to shop our values, so we strive to. And basic economics tells us that increasing demand for quality food can lead to lower production costs, right?

I could write about food for days, and many people have done so much better than I could. Check out Food Inc or In Defense of Food, for starters.

Waiting for Superman

I'm not a big Oprah fan, but I'm home sick today and tuned in. Today Oprah is doing what she does best--bringing awareness of a social issue to her (largely) middle class audience. The topic: our broken educational system. The documentary Waiting for Superman exposes just how outdated our current education model is and shows how unequal access is to quality education. While some people can afford to send their children to excellent schools, or are blessed to live in good districts, others are stuck with unacceptably bad education.

First: There are SO many quality teachers out there. I had many of them as a student, and I know many of them as an adult. Kudos to each of them. I hope their enthusiasm spreads.

Second: Most parents I know care deeply about the educational opportunity available to their children. Not all of those parents have equal resources to affect that opportunity.

Third: The program asserts that if each of us cared about education for all children the way we care about education for our own children, then everyone would be better off.

What do you think?

I think I'm going to watch the film. Then I think I am going to learn more about my local school district--not just the ones "my kids" attend.

Check out the Harlem Children's Zone, an innovative and transformative approach to education and community with excellent outcomes.

Just Living, Round 1

Why the heck am I starting another blog?

There are so many blogs I love. I love how Dana shares her discoveries (and excellent taste). I love how Nancy shares her family adventures, while Julie reflects on a lifestyle of service. Carla always tells the truth, even when it's hard--and I always learn from her. And Cara, the lovely woman who suggested I start a new blog, reflects on the little thoughts, feelings, and ideas that come along, integrating them with musings on weightier matters.

So with these and so many more blogs out there, why another?

After months of conversation, Cara thought we should bring it public. We’ve shared the challenge of living in our culture without relying on exploitation or long-term harm, as well as our plans for taking time for ourselves and our love ones to enjoy the simple things. Both of these are lessons I am seeking: living simply, living in justice . . . just living.

I care very deeply about matters of justice and mercy. As an American, it is extremely difficult to live those values in an integrated way--as it stands, I am typing this on a laptop which likely contains cadmium sourced from oppressive warlords. Perhaps my soapbox issues don’t make the best dinner conversation, but I am drawn to them no less.

While I spend my days as a social worker and volunteering in global issues, I believe that everyone can change the world. We need electricians, bringing light and warmth. We need financial services, managing the funds we use to care for ourselves and others. We need medical professionals, academics, engineers, and service workers. We need technicians. We need full-time parents. Our society needs everyone, working together and caring about justice, to make the world a better place.

So, after this winding all over the place, why the new blog?

To give and receive encouragement with other people seeking to act justly in their daily lives, beyond the way they earn a living.

To share my heart in loving mercy, and to share what I learn from others who love mercy.

To reflect on lessons in walking humbly, as I am finally learning the importance of caring gently for myself as I seek to care for others.

I don’t promise brilliance, innovation, or even entertainment. But for people considering how daily life affects the world—in global and local issues of justice, and in the lives of our family and friends—I promise conversation, ideas, and encouragement. Like my friends, I’ll share tips and daily musings, reflect on my career, and speak honestly from my perspective. And I promise a deeper glimpse into who I am as I seek to live my values; living simply, seeking justice, just living.

I hope you’ll join me.