ToT Returns!

Together on Tuesday is back!

I still have some catch-up posts to do (and they are floating around in my head!), but I'm forging onward! Let Together on Tuesday 2013 commence!

Many of the ToT ladies are posting a photo a day. I know myself better than to promise anything like that--that isn't happening. I WISH I loved (or was good at) taking photos. I love having the photos, but I find the whole process daunting . . . remembering to take them, getting a good shot, uploading, editing, storing, ordering, sharing, displaying . . . not my forte. That's why there's Purple Peaches Photography! But I digress.

I am taking more photos, really I am. I am planning to post more of them--grandmas like that :). And I am planning to post a photo year in review . . .that is still coming! But there will be no daily photos from me.

There WILL be plenty of Together on Tuesday posts, on topics shared with the ladies to the right--Charlotte at The Dog Days of Life, Danielle at My Peaches and Cream, Michelle at After 9 and Some Weekends, and Nancy at Purple Peaches. (There are some other ladies as well, but I haven't heard if they are still on the train . . . ) It really is pretty great to blog along with encouraging women--and it's good motivation to keep writing, which is good for the soul (at least for my soul). If you're interested in joining in, we'd love to have you! Just comment below and we'll get you connected.

I have a few Just Living posts in mind, too . . . you know, about the little ways anyone can change the world. I tend to write ToT with the Just Living bent, but I have a few more things to share here and there. My social worker mind never shuts down . . . I love thinking about this, but sitting down to write becomes the challenge. I'd love to hear from anyone on this, too--guest posts are welcome, comments, thoughts, ideas, questions, you name it.

So that's that. Thank you for reading--I hope you'll stay on and join in when the spirit moves!

Guest Blogger: Freedom

Here's the promised guest post about Freedom a la Cart, the innovative way to support women who have survived the horrors of human trafficking and are building a new life.  They are working towards growing their food cart into a restaurant and they could use our help. And yes, the blogger is my sister-in-law. 

Happy Boxing Day!

Freedom is hummus. Perhaps not to you. But to me, hummus is what Freedom tastes like. The relationships I have built with survivors of Human Trafficking have propelled me to redefine Freedom, as it exists from their perspectives. Watching a survivor taste hummus for the first time brought so much joy to me. In a room of 25 survivors, no one had ever tasted it; many were hesitant to even dip a chip in it, let alone a carrot stick or pita bread. But the wide smile on the face of the first survivor who ‘dove in’, was all they needed to form a new love for this strange chick-pea blend. And that one smile led the rest of the women into a new world of ‘healthful’ eating. It was a bold move early on by one of our volunteers—but she knows that part of her volunteer work is to continue to introduce the survivors to freedom and choices that have been unknown and unavailable to them. 

Merry Christmas

{fair trade nativity available at serrv, a partner of lutheran world relief}

A Christmas Prayer

by Daniel Lee of Lutheran World Relief

God of Light, who illumines night,

Come to those now in darkness.

God of plenty, who multiplies joy,

Come to those now in sorrow.

God of promise,

who creates the harvest,

Come to those now in hunger.

This Christmas and always, 

We trust in your light,

your plenty and your promises.

Teach us again, through Word and deed,

of the Christ child

made flesh among us:

Who breaks the rod of oppression,

That we might work for justice;

Who removes the yoke of burden,

That our neighbor might

walk with dignity;

Who sets the tools of war afire,

That all creation might live in peace.

Amen.

Merry Christmas to each and every one of you.

A Holiday Glow

In light of the craziness in the world, I am thinking more about ways we can make the world a little bit warmer, a little bit brighter. The holidays are a time when people often find renewed enthusiasm for giving to others--and the year-end tax motivation to donate doesn't hurt, either.

Full disclosure: these are all projects or organizations I have had some connection to over the years, which means I am sharing with confidence. I believe in this work and I have seen real change as a result of their efforts. Isn't that why we give, to make a change? 

We all have a part in making the world a better place. If you are looking for new ways to do just that, keep reading. One of these might just be a perfect fit.

A Russian Orphanage

If you've read at all, you know Ben and I have been involved with Sovietsk Orphanage in Kirov, Russia over the last 7 years or so. Children's HopeChest oversees the work we do here. The children are amazing, and we love them with our whole hearts. We used to visit regularly, but having a little one has changed that. We instead work to find financial support for needs, such as therapies, schooling, or basics like gardening supplies. For example, we have been working on getting a hearing aid to one of the boys . . . we were thrilled to find a donor for the whole thing, but we have hit a snag. Finding donors for international projects, especially when we aren't traveling as before, has proven a challenge--so ANY contributions are welcome! More than money, these children need someone to notice them, care for them, invest in them. You can participate by sending a one-time financial gift, a monthly sponsorship gift, or even just writing letters. Visit the other blog for more information on how to donate. If you have any questions at all, please contact me.

A Health Clinic in Ethiopia

Doma International 's new health clinic is right in line with current thinking about the smartest and most effective way to support women and children around the world: maternal and infant medicine. By working alongside people in the village of Bora and bringing education and medical care, they are able to give women, children, and families a chance to thrive and grow together. I could go on and on with stories I have heard from Ethiopia, and I hope to go myself someday. For now, we are supporting from home . . .

The medical director Amber (who happens to be a longtime friend of the Clarks) has made such an impact, there is a little girl in Bora named after her. You see and hear Ben's brother in the video, and Ben's parents have also made the trip. Supporting the Hidota Center is a great way to be a part of something bigger and long-term . . . if becoming a careholder is too much for now, a gift of any size will help.

Rebuilding Lives for Survivors of Human Trafficking in Columbus, Ohio

You have seen me post about human trafficking again and again. Here is a frickin' cool way to actually make a difference to the women who have survived it right next door, in Ohio. As they are rebuilding their lives, they need support, skills, and stability--something Doma is working to offer them.

I would not be one bit surprised if, once this restaurant gets off the ground, we see this model replicated in cities all over the country. We can all be a part of getting this enterprise off the ground and helping these women build hope and a future. Stay tuned for a guest blog on this in the days ahead.


I could go on and on and on . . . there are some inspiring local children's agencies, such as The Villages or Damar Services. There are arts communities, such as Indianapolis Symphonic Choir. There are community centers like The Sharing Place or The Love Center . If I listed every place that inspires me and that I believe truly makes a difference, this blog would be endless. There are countless places where you could write a check and donate your time and truly make a difference. These are a few that move me . . . but the most important things is that we all find a few who move us, who are truly doing good work, and that we jump right in.

I love cozying up with my family over the holidays and enjoying the glow of the lights, the fire, a warm meal, our love for each other. But our glow is that much warmer and brighter when we find a way to share it outside of our own four walls, all year round.

What about you? How do you share your holiday glow?

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Only at Christmas Time

None of the posts kicking around my head right now seem quite right.

I, like many around the world, am still reeling from the horrific events of last Friday . . . but my flood of thoughts and feelings is nothing compared to the devastation felt by those directly affected by the shooting in Connecticut.

I will likely say more on this matter in the future. For now, my heart is with the families of every person--all of them--affected by this tragedy. 

As I held my little boy while he slept on Saturday, I kept thinking about all of those parents who once held their babies just the same way. I expect most or even all of the people at the school last Friday have had a parent hold them close, whisper in their ear, hope for their future, and give them sweet kisses. Not a one of them ever dreamed this for their sweet little baby.

Holidays are tough when you've lost someone precious. They are forever changed. Even more so for these families, with the anniversary of these unspeakable events coming every year as they prepare for Christmas. Christmas is when we tell the story of a sweet little baby, born to do amazing things, born to endure horror, born to save the world. I am thinking of his mother and father, and all of the mothers and fathers grieving in Connecticut and around the world, and my heart is singing this humble prayer.

Rest in Peace, sweet little angels, and peace to all of the souls who have loved you.

ToT: Tradition!

So, today is one of those days . . . in a good way, maybe. My to-do list was woefully neglected, just a few things knocked off, but my kid and I had fun (stair climbing and dance parties!), I got a few calls made, and I got to spend a few short minutes with a good friend. No one ever regrets leaving a to-do list when they die, I think, unless those items meant something to the people they loved. So oh well that I still have plenty to do, right?

(Also, I am so technologically incompetent it is getting embarrassing. Am I the only one who can barely function on Skype these days? I have people to call!)

I say that because I have a slight tinge of guilt about blogging . . . I have work to do (for work) and things to do around the house, I have projects I'd like to work on (important ones like things for our Russian friends or the baby book, plus some little things like mending and stuff like that), I have a husband I'd like to hang out with, and I haven't done my nails in weeks. It's not pretty, people. But I'm blogging . . . because it's just a few minutes of slowing down and reflecting on the simple pleasure of holiday traditions. If you're among the lovely people on my to-call list, I am thinking of you as I write! (And if you can make Skype work for me, YAY!)

I love holiday traditions . . . most of ours are very simple, but the joy of sharing them with James who has new eyes for everything is enough to make me want to burst. When I was little, we always initiated the Christmas season with a decorating party. My mom made all kinds of little treats (cheese and crackers and cookies and hot chocolate and egg nog and simple, yummy things) and we put on our Christmas records (lots of great Choral arrangements, like the Boar's Head Carol and Masters in this Hall and Britten and Handel and all kinds of things) and we decorated! We weren't Martha Stewart or anything, but just about everything on the tree has a memory attached, and we took the time to notice.  When we were done, we would cuddle up in our jammies and watch our Christmas shows. I have so much happy nostalgia around this, it's ridiculous. I knew that this was THE tradition I would carry on in my family, so we do.

We watch A Charlie Brown Christmas every year. This year, our Peanut is pretty excited about "Boopy!" so that makes it extra fun. And my mom's favorite, and I mean FAVORITE, is The Snowman . . . the wordless story about James, a little boy whose snowman comes to life for just one night. It's bittersweet, but mostly sweet. This was the first show our James snuggled in and watched from start to finish, and he has seen it quite a few times already. He loves it, and his grandma loves that he loves it, and I love watching the two of them bundled up in a snowman blanket to watch it.

{From The Snowman by Raymond Briggs}

There are other things we like to do . . . we have our Christmas morning traditions (brunch at home in our PJs and then on to Grandmas) and extended family traditions (New Year's in Ohio with a mini Christmas pageant by all the cousins) and I try to see all of my aunts and uncles and grandparents and cousins, too. We used to take the long way home after midnight Christmas Eve service and look at all of the lights, but we may have to adjust again this year with a little one in tow.

I am looking forward to new traditions as they emerge . . . how will James respond to the first snow of the year? Will he love the zoo, or the Eiteljorg, or the Circle, or Jolly Days? Will he dance to this ridiculous Cha-Cha Slide Santa from Aunt Marilynn every year? (So far, the answer is yes. Two for two.) I want to do them ALL. I don't like to force them, but I don't want to miss any of them.

This is the paradox of parenting . . . well, one of them . . . I want to experience every last little thing and document it and remember it, but if I put so much energy in to making things happen then I will miss the little things along the way (like impromptu dance parties and playing outside in DECEMBER, for pity's sake). Ideally, I would have a cute little photo of our decorating party this year, but I don't--aside from the ones in my head. Those are irreplaceable. (And blogging along the way will help, too.) In my dream world, I will find the perfect balance of making memories and living in the moment. For now, hanging our "Joy" ornament that we bought when we found out we were having a baby, or hanging the Snoopy and Lucy that were my brother's and mine as kids, or hanging the gifts we got for our wedding or in places we used to live or from around the world is as good of a holiday scrapbook as any.

What do YOU love to do every year? Check out the other Together on Tuesday bloggers for their traditions!

ToT: Black Friday, Indeed

Today, I am posting my Together on Tuesday topic RIGHT ON TIME! Barely. Small victories.

Time to share our thoughts on Black Friday. If you've been reading my blog for any length of time, it won't be hard to guess what I have to say.

"Christmas is not only getting too commercial, it's getting too dangerous."

Happy Thanksgiving

Gratitude

Ah, November. The leaves change from colorful to brown and crunchy, the air from cool to biting. We Scorpios celebrate our birthdays. There's an odd mix of Halloween leftovers and Christmas early birds all around. College football gets serious--OSU vs Michigan, anyone? And we spend the month reflecting on gratitude.

I like the idea of taking all of November listing the many things for which I am thankful--I even got into the spirit on Facebook, which takes some commitment (if you're me). Being the type who is constantly striving to do more and do it better, there is a lot of value in my reflecting on the good things all around me. I've spent a lot of time examining deficits in hopes of improvement, but that's only valuable when you can enjoy the good things as they are. Professionally, social workers try to be strengths-based--the theory being that we grow more when we focus on our strengths rather than our problems. I could use more of that in my daily life--even in this blog, really. I have been blessed with far more rainbows than thunderstorms in my world. So, again, with the lists . . . and since it's my 33rd year, 33 is the magic number. 

Here are 33 Things I am Thankful for in my 33rd Year.

A Thanksgiving Sermon

{from homegrownhospitality.typepad.com}

ToT Rewind: Busyness, Stillness

Flashback . . . ToT topic from September . . .

We're reflecting this week on The Busy Trap. Good reading from NY Times, I think. If you would rather not read, though, basically the author is considering whether or not all of our busy-ness is worthwhile. He asserts much of it is self-imposed, mindless clutter that may not always enhance our lives. I guess I agree.

33 Things

Hello, old friends.

I've missed writing. I have been occupied with other things. I left a job I loved for a job that was a better fit for my family and my life, and the transition took a lot of energy. We are settling in now and I am so thankful for the opportunity to do what I love and care for my family at the same time. But more about that later.

Danielle at My Peaches and Cream wrote a few weeks back about how hard it is to blog when all this heavy-duty life is going on all around you. I've been living that lately. Lots of serious stuff in lots of places, and our little family keeps trying to share the love where it needs to be shared. It feels silly to sit and type when real life is happening--except that real life is always happening, and writing helps keep me sane.

So, I'm back. At least for now. I'm squeezing this in a small window between rushing home from a rehearsal and hanging out with my husband. And my heart is full, full, full for a dear friend and her family who are grieving a tremendous loss. And I'm getting old, people. In the spirit of my pending 33rd birthday, and in in the interest of writing at all, I give you 33 Things.

1. Life is amazing.
2. A wise woman once told me we never feel we have enough time with the people we love.
3. Think about that as you decide what's important to do RIGHT NOW. Today. Tomorrow.
4. Also, all of the time we get with the beautiful people placed in our lives is a gift.
5. I have always thought people deserve respect just for being human.
6. That includes people who are different from us.
7. There are good, kind, intelligent, caring people on all sides of any issue.
8. There are people who get the brunt of other people's frustration far too often.
9. Those are the people I feel drawn to protect.
10. They probably don't need my protection--they have done just fine without me for a long time.
11. So instead, I will constantly work for what I believe is just and true.
12. And, I will constantly look around, listen to other people, and learn about what justice and truth really mean.
13. That's what I love about being a social worker.
14. I hope I can be the kind of mom whose children grow up knowing integrity, compassion, and courage.
15. If people were as engaged in service as they are in political rhetoric, the world would be a better place.
16. I am extremely grateful for my parents.
17. I am extremely grateful for my friends.
18. I am extremely grateful for my mind and education.
19. I am extremely humbled and grateful that I continue to grow and change.
20. My mom said a few years back that there is no reason the coming years can't be the happiest of our lives.
21. That was a big deal, because we have a big hole in our family that will never be filled.
22. I thought that was a pretty courageous statement.
23. I think that's what hope means.
24. I'm glad my husband challenges me.
25. Being a mother challenges me in ways I never could have conceived before.
26. Watching my child grow is ridiculous and inspiring and humbling and fascinating and joyful.
27. I guess I have been feeling soulful these days.
28. Impermanence is the only permanence.
29. It is an honor to grow older.
30. I wonder if being an adult means there is more heavy-duty life going on around us all the time.
31. Maybe that's why there are children--to bring the joy and light.
32. I love my boy so much it hurts. Really.
33. In honor of a dear friend:

"I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, only more love." 

~Mother Teresa

Another day, I'll be back with a lighter heart. For now, my heart is grateful for my mama, my family, my friends. I'm a lucky one.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Hi, bloggy friends,

Don't worry, I'm not abandoning you. (As if you were worried.) Just off taking care of a few things, going through some changes, and having a little fun. I'll be back soon enough. Not sure when, but soon enough. (Because I always have something to say.)

In the meantime, keep reading the lovely ladies on the right of the screen.

                                                  Cheers,             

ToT (late again!): State of the Union

I've been pretty distracted this week, mostly with good stuff. We've got some changes coming. AND my baby boy has turned ONE! His birthday was Tuesday, so I took a break. I'll be blogging about that soon . . . my thoughts and feelings keep swirling. I guess that's motherhood.

Last week, though, we were to write about the state of things today. Is the country falling apart? Going to 'hell in a handbasket?' Why?

Whew.

I could say a LOT on this, but I am going to try not to. (Don't laugh.) I think I have a few unique perspectives on this, being a social worker married to an historian--I have a front-row seat to some of the uglier sides of our culture, and a chat with my husband can help me put that in context. So a few thoughts . . .