ToT: RAOK

SO.

Today was a Random Act of Kindness challenge. As in do one, then write about it.

A little background . . .

This one was my idea, for a few reasons. Random Acts of Kindness (RAOK) kind of came back into my view following the Sandy Hook tragedy . . . as in do an act of kindness in honor of each life lost. It's a lovely way to attempt to find the light in a dark situation, I think. It got me thinking . . . I've been doing more than my share of navel gazing over the last couple of years. I'm all for introspection and self-awareness--I believe it makes us better people and therefore makes the world a better place--but the balance has been off. There is plenty of mess and muck to trudge through, and I've made it my career to do so in hopes of making an impact, but it gets awfully heavy sometimes. I wanted to challenge myself to find simple, light-hearted ways to make the world a better place.

I've often thought of little ideas here or there that might be fun, but actually doing them is a different story. Absent-mindedness or laziness sets in, distractions arise, doubts surface, or whatever the reason, many of my so-called good ideas go undone. So what good are they, really? Then there's the whole 'random' aspect. Intentional acts of kindness ring a bit more true to me . . . seeking out a particular person in a particular situation to share a particular something is more my style. And, lots of things people categorize as 'random acts of kindness' seem like just common courtesy . . . you know, like smiling at the check-out clerk.

So, choosing a 'random act of kindness,' meaning some kind of gesture for someone I don't know intended to brighten their day, became the task. If you're an extrovert, maybe this is not daunting at all. In theory, I didn't think it would be either, until it was actually time to DO it. Lots of typical ideas didn't sit right with me . . . I don't go through drive-throughs often at all. Or I convinced myself there were all kinds of logistical reasons I couldn't pull it off, lugging a toddler around. (Again, I just have the one kid--I admire all of you mamas out there with more!) It felt almost awkward, surprisingly, to think about how to do something kind and out-of-the-ordinary without fumbling around . . . Or it just didn't seem special enough, BIG enough, worth writing about.

And then I realized I was doing it again . . . letting the perfect be the enemy of the good. As fellow blogger Danielle's husband (and a stand-up guy from back in high school) said, "Sometimes DONE is better than PERFECT." I could spend days coming up with some elaborate scheme, or I could just brighten someone's day.

You can download free printables at thirtyhandmadedays.com

So, I just looked in front of me and started there. It has been awfully icky outside, and we have a little stash of Starbucks cards inside, and our mail carrier brings us all kinds of wonderful things like magazines and baby shoes and Etsy packages through all kinds of weather, and warm beverages are cozy and comforting. So I fixed up a little thank you card, added a ribbon to hang it and make it kind of special, threw the gift card inside along with one of the cards to the right (thank you, Pinterest and thirtyhandmadedays.com), hung it on our mailbox, and there you have it.

I don't remember speaking with the mail carrier but once previously, as I happened to be leaving for a run as he was arriving. So he was definitely a stranger. And when the card had awkwardly fallen on the ground before he arrived, he had to awkwardly ring the bell and ask if it was for him--to which I un-awkwardly (by sheer determination) said yes, it was, just a little something. He said thank you, something is better than nothing (he meant that kindly, I think), and went along about his day.

Honestly, this was about the lowest-effort RAOK I could have pulled off. Part of me feels guilty about this. Part of me thinks I should have found something spectacular. Part of me thinks if this was so simple, why did it take nearly 8 years of living here before I left the mailman a thank you?

And most of me realizes that is a silly reason to feel guilty--as well as a good reason to change that moving forward. No more *thinking* about baking cookies to take to the new neighbors, just do it! No more hemming and hawing over small gestures because we're not sure how they will be received . . . if they are done in kindness and respect, and the recipient is treated in kindness and respect regardless of their response, that's what matters.

I do have a few more ideas about some RAOKs and intentional acts of kindness that I would like to do moving forward. I loved an idea I read--taping quarters to the children's vending machines at the store. I've had a few ideas on how to brighten the workday at the office. And who knows, maybe I will get a flash of genius about a witty, creative, delightful RAOK to put together with more planning and effort. Maybe I won't. Either way, I believe that small gestures can have a big impact, sometimes cumulatively as the smiles ripple throughout the day, or sometimes all on their own. I want James to believe this, too. So together, as a family, we seek to intentionally share kindness in our world, in the little things every day. It's just good for everyone.

I can't wait to hear the thoughts of the other ToT ladies. Check out the links to the right!

What about you? Have you ever been on the receiving end of one of these RAOKs? Do tell!

ToT: Secondhand Shopping

Secondhand shopping is such an excellent, ethical choice . . . I love it.

-It reduces environmental impact: fewer materials and less waste (both the product itself and the manufacturing), fewer shipping emissions, saves landfill space, etc.
-It supports local economy.
-It reduces the demand of new production of items and sends a message to manufacturers that more is not always more. Down with consumerism!
-It reduces the demand for items that may have been sourced or manufactured in slave conditions.
-It often supports job creation for small businesses or individuals who may not have many other opportunities. (Goodwill, for example, hires a number of employees with intellectual disabilities.)
-You can find all kinds of crazy stuff you wouldn't find elsewhere.
-You can usually get a good bargain.

Guest Blogger: Freedom

Here's the promised guest post about Freedom a la Cart, the innovative way to support women who have survived the horrors of human trafficking and are building a new life.  They are working towards growing their food cart into a restaurant and they could use our help. And yes, the blogger is my sister-in-law. 

Happy Boxing Day!

Freedom is hummus. Perhaps not to you. But to me, hummus is what Freedom tastes like. The relationships I have built with survivors of Human Trafficking have propelled me to redefine Freedom, as it exists from their perspectives. Watching a survivor taste hummus for the first time brought so much joy to me. In a room of 25 survivors, no one had ever tasted it; many were hesitant to even dip a chip in it, let alone a carrot stick or pita bread. But the wide smile on the face of the first survivor who ‘dove in’, was all they needed to form a new love for this strange chick-pea blend. And that one smile led the rest of the women into a new world of ‘healthful’ eating. It was a bold move early on by one of our volunteers—but she knows that part of her volunteer work is to continue to introduce the survivors to freedom and choices that have been unknown and unavailable to them. 

A Holiday Glow

In light of the craziness in the world, I am thinking more about ways we can make the world a little bit warmer, a little bit brighter. The holidays are a time when people often find renewed enthusiasm for giving to others--and the year-end tax motivation to donate doesn't hurt, either.

Full disclosure: these are all projects or organizations I have had some connection to over the years, which means I am sharing with confidence. I believe in this work and I have seen real change as a result of their efforts. Isn't that why we give, to make a change? 

We all have a part in making the world a better place. If you are looking for new ways to do just that, keep reading. One of these might just be a perfect fit.

A Russian Orphanage

If you've read at all, you know Ben and I have been involved with Sovietsk Orphanage in Kirov, Russia over the last 7 years or so. Children's HopeChest oversees the work we do here. The children are amazing, and we love them with our whole hearts. We used to visit regularly, but having a little one has changed that. We instead work to find financial support for needs, such as therapies, schooling, or basics like gardening supplies. For example, we have been working on getting a hearing aid to one of the boys . . . we were thrilled to find a donor for the whole thing, but we have hit a snag. Finding donors for international projects, especially when we aren't traveling as before, has proven a challenge--so ANY contributions are welcome! More than money, these children need someone to notice them, care for them, invest in them. You can participate by sending a one-time financial gift, a monthly sponsorship gift, or even just writing letters. Visit the other blog for more information on how to donate. If you have any questions at all, please contact me.

A Health Clinic in Ethiopia

Doma International 's new health clinic is right in line with current thinking about the smartest and most effective way to support women and children around the world: maternal and infant medicine. By working alongside people in the village of Bora and bringing education and medical care, they are able to give women, children, and families a chance to thrive and grow together. I could go on and on with stories I have heard from Ethiopia, and I hope to go myself someday. For now, we are supporting from home . . .

The medical director Amber (who happens to be a longtime friend of the Clarks) has made such an impact, there is a little girl in Bora named after her. You see and hear Ben's brother in the video, and Ben's parents have also made the trip. Supporting the Hidota Center is a great way to be a part of something bigger and long-term . . . if becoming a careholder is too much for now, a gift of any size will help.

Rebuilding Lives for Survivors of Human Trafficking in Columbus, Ohio

You have seen me post about human trafficking again and again. Here is a frickin' cool way to actually make a difference to the women who have survived it right next door, in Ohio. As they are rebuilding their lives, they need support, skills, and stability--something Doma is working to offer them.

I would not be one bit surprised if, once this restaurant gets off the ground, we see this model replicated in cities all over the country. We can all be a part of getting this enterprise off the ground and helping these women build hope and a future. Stay tuned for a guest blog on this in the days ahead.


I could go on and on and on . . . there are some inspiring local children's agencies, such as The Villages or Damar Services. There are arts communities, such as Indianapolis Symphonic Choir. There are community centers like The Sharing Place or The Love Center . If I listed every place that inspires me and that I believe truly makes a difference, this blog would be endless. There are countless places where you could write a check and donate your time and truly make a difference. These are a few that move me . . . but the most important things is that we all find a few who move us, who are truly doing good work, and that we jump right in.

I love cozying up with my family over the holidays and enjoying the glow of the lights, the fire, a warm meal, our love for each other. But our glow is that much warmer and brighter when we find a way to share it outside of our own four walls, all year round.

What about you? How do you share your holiday glow?

Merry Christmas, everyone.

ToT (late again!): State of the Union

I've been pretty distracted this week, mostly with good stuff. We've got some changes coming. AND my baby boy has turned ONE! His birthday was Tuesday, so I took a break. I'll be blogging about that soon . . . my thoughts and feelings keep swirling. I guess that's motherhood.

Last week, though, we were to write about the state of things today. Is the country falling apart? Going to 'hell in a handbasket?' Why?

Whew.

I could say a LOT on this, but I am going to try not to. (Don't laugh.) I think I have a few unique perspectives on this, being a social worker married to an historian--I have a front-row seat to some of the uglier sides of our culture, and a chat with my husband can help me put that in context. So a few thoughts . . .

ToT: The Darker Side of the Olympics

We have a new Together on Tuesday blogger! Welcome, Katie, from Fun Home Things!

So, the topic today is the Olympics. My husband LOVES the Olympics, and I enjoy them too. In another life I would have been a gymnast, I know it, and Ben is really hoping for a chance to race Usain Bolt. I thought instead of answering all the ToT topic questions (sorry, guys), I'd take a Just Living perspective about the Olympics.

I could write about Gabby's hair. (Anyone notice that the other girls' hair isn't exactly ready for the red carpet? It's called being an ATHLETE.) I could write about the awkward balance between entertainment that brings people together and the massive amount of money spent or the environmental impact. But again, I'm taking it back to human trafficking. (To read more, click the modern day slavery label in the cloud on the right.)

ToT: Current Events

So . . . today's Together on Tuesday topics is either a wild card or your thoughts on some current events . . . namely, the Aurora, CO shootings and the Chick-fil-A drama around anti-gay marriage comments and contributions. I have a wild card formulating, but it seems kind of shallow to write about clothes--even ethically-sourced clothes--with these subjects on the table. Good grief, the whole point about this blog is how to impact and respond to society in a way that promotes justice, mercy, and humility. Plus, I'm a social worker. People usually do NOT want to hear me speak on this type of topic. I often have a lot to say, and in these cases, much of what I think, feel, and believe has already been said by others elsewhere. So, I am going to tackle both topics with the same principle in mind.

There are real people involved in these issues.

ToT on Wednesday: FOOD

So I'm late. It happens.

And the crazy part is the subject is food, one of my favorite things in the world! There is SO much I could write about from a Just Living perspective . . . I have posts started on why I'm a vegetarian, ethical food choices, all kinds of good stuff. And we are going through another food shake-up around here, thanks to little guy. Turns out his little body doesn't like cow milk--or rather the proteins in it (casein and whey)--or gluten, a protein found in wheat, barley, and a few other grains. He doesn't have a full-on allergy, but he does have a sensitivity. If mama eats either of those items, we see skin reactions, runny nose, and a fun assortment of digestive issues in our little fella. As it turns out, theory goes if baby has a sensitivity, mama likely does too, just undetected since I've gotten used to the effects. So no dairy or gluten for me! It's been challenging, but kinda fun because it's forced some creativity. And honestly, I feel better without it.

This started a whole host of obsessive research about food, how we eat now, how we ate historically, what has changed about the food itself, what do we really need to be healthy. I've found some enlightening stuff and a few crazies. I had been toying with the idea of being vegan for awhile, for a lot of reasons. (Mark Bittman, for one, has lots of info, and while you can read about dairy in particular here, the information applies to lots of factory farmed foods.) As it stands, I am semi-vegan--I am mostly vegan, but I am OK with eating some animal products here and there. For me, that includes honey, eggs (we get ours via Green Bean Delivery from a pastured farm in northern Indiana), and occasional fish (though fishing practices make me cringe, that is a project for another day). We also eat a good amount of organic food, though we are not psycho about it or anything. And we are working on cutting sugar around here, too. It is fun to eat, but it is kind of the devil.

So . . . I wanted to share a favorite recipe with you, at the request of my Together on Tuesday friends. And I wanted it to be something that fits the criteria above. That ruled out some of my favorite cakes, cookies, and tarts, as well as some gooey, cheesy dishes. But it leaves one of my all-time favorites that I've been making for nearly a decade, and one of my most-requested recipes: straight-up, plan and simple hummus.

Hummus

1 16 oz can garbanzos, rinsed (or about 1 1/2 cups cooked garbanzos, which is even better. BPA-free cans suggested if you go the canned route.)

2 cloves garlic

Juice of 1 lemon, or about 3 Tbsp

3 Tbsp Tahini (sesame paste)

3 tsp cumin powder, toasted

Olive Oil

Freshly ground black pepper

Sea salt 

Garnish with paprika, chopped parsley, tomatoes, kalmata olives

Toast cumin in a dry pan until scent is strong and set aside.

Crush garlic and saute in olive oil until cooked through

Add garbanzos, tahini, garlic with oil, some salt, cumin, a couple Tbsp of water, and about half the lemon juice into a food processor. Gradually stream in some olive oil and water as you process until smooth. 

(If using a blender, add liquids first and add garbanzos gradually.)

Adjust consistency by adding olive oil or water a bit at a time. 

Spread into a serving dish and drizzle with olive oil, lemon, salt, and pepper,

Extra yummy if you let it stand a day and then garnish as above. I always serve it with veggies, and pita is another popular choice.

Nothing fancy, but it's a staple around here, and it's one of my comfort foods. I hope you like it!

Check out the other Together on Tuesday bloggers, listed to the right, for more favorites.

Together on Tuesday: There's No Place Like Home

Home is where the heart is . . . home is wherever I'm with you . . . home sweet home. I've been thinking more about home lately . . . well, more about houses and where we'd like to live for the next chunk of our life. And babies change everything.

I wish I had studied abroad in college. I can't think of a better time to live somewhere else. Now, as a married woman, and especially as a mama, it is all but off the table. I still dream of it. I've had flashes of moving here countless times:

This is our Russian home, Sovietsk, in Kirov region. It's beautiful. Life is slower, though not always simpler. The people are warm and welcoming, and we love the children who live here with all our hearts. Daydreams often take me here.

I've always had the travel bug, and though I travel much less than I would like, everywhere I go I imagine living there. I could see myself bounding around, as long as I had my people with me. Life near mountains . . . or water . . . or in a slower-paced culture, away from materialism . . . it's all very appealing.

So if the opportunity came to move to some wonderful destination, would we take it?

The payoff would have to be amazing, and we would have to have finances and schedules that allowed frequent, regular trips to family. And even then, I'm not convinced we would say yes. Reality almost never lives up to the dream, and building a life away from treasured family and friends requires a lot of sacrifice. We've lived somewhere where we knew no one, and we said it would take a LOT for us to do that again. If I could teleport--my superpower of choice--this conversation would be SO different. But I can't.

My son needs stability and roots. He needs grandparents nearby, aunts & uncles, cousins, friends. He needs a sense of home. I was lucky enough to grow up with one. No way would I take that from him. So would I leave home for greener pastures? Never say never, but right now . . . No.

Indianapolis is my home, and it has been Ben's home for 7 years now. It gets a bad rap, but I love it, and it keeps getting better. (Though for the record . . . more innovative vegetarian restaurants couldn't hurt!) My people are here, and Ben's family is in easy driving distance. I could easily list what I love and what I could use more of in Indianapolis, but I think I'm going to focus on the house itself. Now we live in a little ranch in Beech Grove, and we are pondering moving on . . . staying home, in Indianapolis, but finding a new little nest to call our own.

We don't want to lose some of the things we love about our current nest: safe, walkable neighborhood (where we can literally run out to the store at just about any time), nice backyard for the boy and the garden, good neighbors, 10 minutes from downtown, close to grandparents and friends. But we wouldn't mind losing the busy street, one little bathroom, two little bedrooms, and nowhere sneaky to hide the litter box. (Eww.)

For years Ben and I have been eyeing downtown living, Fountain Square, Irvington, or SoBro/Meridian Kessler/Butler Tarkington neighborhoods. We love the vibe of older homes, and we believe in using existing structures to their fullest instead of building new. We want a diverse neighborhood, in many senses of the word. We want to be in walking distance to parks, groceries, food and entertainment, and even friends. We are weighing driving--to work, to church, to grandparents and friends--in terms of time, money, and environmental impact. If we could find a home that minimized energy use and maximized natural light, that would be great. If we could find an older home that was affordable, ready to go, and didn't require much upkeep, that would be a miracle.

What's crazy to us is we are finding quite a bit of that in a neighborhood we never imagined . . . the good ol' subdivision. Yep, we're considering it, quite seriously. While the one we're considering isn't in walking distance to stores, that is pretty much the only thing missing from our list. And it happens to have a pretty great family already living there.

We don't ask for a lot, we just want a simple home where we can focus on what really matters to us . . . you know, just living. So, it just may be that this little boy is moving me from wild dreams of living abroad to a little subdivision where he can ride his bike and play with his friends. And that is perfectly OK with me.

Check out Charlotte, Danielle, Michelle, and Nancy to see if the grass is greener on the other side of their fences.

water waste

When thinking about Lent this year, one of the top running disciplines we considered focusing on was our relationship with water. We went a different route this year, but I really, REALLY think it is time for the Clarks to start paying attention.

Full confession: water shortage is an issue I have done very little to address in my personal life. But plentiful, clean water is something we take for granted in the US. And clean water is a justice issue.

For example, worldwide:

-One in eight people lack access to clean water.

-Women in particular spend hours and hours collecting water--missing school and other opportunities and endangering their health and safety.

-Every 20 seconds, a child dies from a water-related disease. We're talking infection, parasites, diarrhea, basic stuff. And in the course of writing this post, 30 children will have died.

-A 5-minute shower in the US uses more water than the typical person living in a 3rd world slum uses in one day!

This and other info is rampant on http://www.water.org/, a charity that works to address these issues around the world.

While I am aware of this, and familiar with it, and while I try to be mindful of avoiding waste in what I purchase or what I do, I have a long way to go until I can say I am having a positive impact on this issue. Maybe we don't water the lawn around here, but I take a notoriously long time in the shower . . . perhaps from my childhood growing up with little privacy, in a somewhat cold house with just a bathtub. (It was a warm, cozy place for an introvert disguised as an extravert. ) Just one example.

Will taking a shorter shower impact the global water situation? I can't say. But it will make a difference around here, and our current water use in this country is not sustainable. Our water is not as clean or plentiful as many of us, myself included, think it is. Think about the gazillion products most of us contribute to the water supply on a daily basis . . . check out any of my posts labeled chemicals to read more, or do some searching for yourself. I have a lot of searching and learning left to do on this matter. I am planning to read Unquenchable by Robert Glennon to learn a bit more.

What about you? What can you teach the rest of us? What are some simple, daily ways we can change our water habits to impact the world towards justice?

Red/Black

I love being married to smarty-pants, socially-minded historian. That means that on Father's Day, which also happened to be Juneteenth this year, we spent the day at the Red/Black exhibit at the Eiteljorg Museum. We've been meaning to go since it opened. It's one of those fascinating places where our two disciplines meet. In fact, opening day hosted lectures from historians and social workers alike. It was fascinating! But more on that later.

First, Juneteenth? Yes, this is one of those interesting and important days I had never heard of until I was married to this smarty-pants guy. It turns out Juneteenth is the oldest commemorative date for celebrating the end of slavery in the US. Pretty important! I'll leave it to you to learn more, if you're interested. In this house, where studying the effects of slavery on 20th century African Americans and dealing with long-term effects of oppression are regular occurances, Juneteenth gets some notice. Not to mention the millions of people still enslaved today, but more on THAT later too.

Lucinda Davis, 1937, former slave of the Creek tribe, from Library of Congress

So, we FINALLY went to Red/Black, third trimester and all. It was worth it. Eiteljorg is the museum of Native American history, and this exhibit explores the intersection of American Indians with African Americans throughout our country's history. We saw documents of the ugliness of slavery, including a receipt for purchase of a 16 year old girl. We heard oral histories taken in the 1930s of African-American freed people (still called freemen, regardless of the womanhood of the person above, but I digress . . .) who were one enslaved by various tribes. (Ben had read many of these before, but I was riveted.) We read how families intertwined and culture overlapped. Both of us learned some pretty shocking things and some pretty encouraging things.

Examples . . . there were times when Native peoples and African slaves were enslaved side-by-side, and then fought their oppressors side-by-side. There were times when certain tribes owned African descended slaves themselves. There were times, even in recent history, when certain groups were quick to reinstate dividing lines between those groups, seeking 'pure' bloodlines and excluding African descendents from citizenship within the tribe. And there were times when groups worked together culturally, socially, and politically, for unity and positive change.

One display asked the question (paraphrased) "Why do people in power exploit others, and when will it end?" I wish we knew. There are more slaves living today than there were during the height of US slavery and legal slave trade--some estimates at 29.2 million. These slaves work in sweatshops, agriculture, manufacturing, housekeeping, massage parlors, nail salons, strip clubs, brothels, you name it. And despite our best efforts, our culture is designed such that you and I likely benefit from this ugliness on a regular basis.

I walked away with another perspective on how easy it is for people to segregate themselves and label the 'other,' if it benefits them. Let those people worry about themselves, I have enought to attend to. I also saw how beautiful it is when people cast those distinctions aside and come together--that is where true change can happen. One man, descended from both African slaves and a native group, shared that he was doubly strong because he had two blood lines--and this in a time when it was illegal for a White person to marry outside the race. There have been brave people throughout history who have changed the culture--even just the culture in their corner of the world--and made the world safer, brighter, and richer for it.

I want to be like that! What if we all were? Could we eradicate slavery in its current form? I believe we could, I really do.

So yes, we were inspired. And humbled.

And we are planning to commemorate Juneteenth each year, from now on.

Haves and Have Nots

I'm all about responsible use of resources. We don't carry debt in our home (aside from mortgage and student loans, and we're diligent with those). We live below our means. If we couldn't pay cash for it, we do without. I'm grateful we've been able to make these choices.

That said, there are instances where people are stuck with 2 bad choices. Do you go into debt or do without the transportation that gets you to work? Do you go into debt or do without medicine that keeps you going?

This new proposed budget gives me a headache. I really, really value fiscal responsibility. But not as much as I value protecting vulnerable members of our society. What is more important to us, as a society?

How did we get to a place where certain people 'deserve' to be wealthy? The argument I hear over and over again is how hard they work for it. That drives me crazy. Why?

Guess who else works hard? Garbage collectors. Certified Nurses Assistants. Construction workers. Warehouse staff. Servers in restaurants. Maintenance workers. Teachers. People who work 3 icky jobs to cover their bills. While I'm at it, why not add social workers?

So that's why tax breaks for the top echelon of society give me a headache. You can find wealthy people who work harder than many average or low-income people. You can find plenty of low-income people who bust their tails every day while some wealthy people rely on other people's hard work to sit pretty. Comparing someone who was born into a wealthy family and inherited a position at a big firm to someone who was born into nothing, treated with little dignity, and worked her way into a $9.25/hr job at age 18, who do you think works harder?

There are all kinds of stories from all kinds of backgrounds, and they are all worthy of respect. The problem comes when society tells us the story of the wealthy person is more valuable than the story of the hard working single mom, or the lonely widow on a fixed low income.

There is disgusting behavior across the socio-economic spectrum. I often hear people decrying the ugliness of welfare fraud, and I agree. If you don't need food stamps, or if you can get by without pulling a big social security check, it would be nice to save those funds for people who truly need them to survive in this culture. We would save a lot of money that way. BUT, how many people in the top 10% income bracket need the luxuries and excess they can afford?

Maybe these painful cuts to programs like heating assistance for low-income citizens or community action programs for struggling neighborhoods wouldn't hurt so bad if I knew everyone was chipping in to keep our society strong. Maybe it wouldn't be so hard to take if I knew we were cutting the fat in our enormous defense fund, or if I knew the only people receiving the assistance that remains were the people who truly needed it.

Maybe the cuts wouldn't be so bad if I saw the best of human behavior, across the socioeconomic spectrum. Maybe people struggling to survive can band together and support each other, although I certainly know that is easier said than done. Maybe people with large incomes who believe in charity over government assistance can fully engage themselves in giving--and not just in charity, but in true social change that unites our society instead of dividing us into haves and have nots. Maybe we can work together across economic lines to build a more just society.

Maybe. But for now, we're stuck with 2 bad choices: an unsustainable budget that tries to care for our struggling citizens, or a slightly more sustainable budget that leaves people even more vulnerable.

Maybe we can find a better way.

Daily Detox: Shabbat Shalom

Ben and I have been working toward a deeper understanding of rest, or Sabbath. Or, as our Jewish friends call it, Shabbat.

Our culture is SO busy. We're always moving, always striving, there's always something to accomplish or some information to learn. Even when we're sitting still, we're stuck to our screens for (sometimes false) connection to the outside world or stimulation. All of this commotion can leave us unconnected to who we are, to those we love, or to the divine.

Enter Sabbath--a truly un-American concept, at least in our times. I am still recovering from the notion that rest is selfish--and I know plenty of people who still hold that belief. But here's an interesting thought: Sabbath is the fourth commandment. Fourth! Before no killing, no adultery, and the like. Sounds like someone smarter than us knows what we need.

I'm not going to comment on the historical or doctrinal implications of Sabbath. That's not my expertise. But I know it is intended as a day of rest, a day to spend with the people we love, and a day to refocus on spiritual matters.

Selfish? I should hope not. How can we be our best selves and bring a light into the world if we are so weakened by busy-ness and blinded by self-importance? The world will go on spinning if we take a break. I promise. What good is our giving to people in our communities and around the world if we cannot even take the time to give to the people in our own families? How can we remain connected to our source and grow into who we are intended to be if we stay to busy to check in spiritually?

And so, a real day of rest and reflection is a necessary detox in our home. We've experimented with different ways to do this. We've stayed away from media (including computers, so you can see this is not today's approach). We've focused on friends and family. We've spent time in solitary reflection and chosen readings particular to the Sabbath. (Check out Abraham Heschel, for starts.) As it turns out, our best Sabbath comes with flow time--time with no schedule, where we can just be together, celebrate, and enjoy the simple things of life.

What about you? How do you rest, reset, detox day-to-day? However you do, we hope that everything is whole and complete, as it was intended to be. Shabbat Shalom!

Super Bowl and Child Slavery

The Super Bowl is coming! While my team is sadly out, I am still a football fan. I'll be watching through the playoffs (and hoping the Bears ride it out), partying and eating and all that good stuff. And as a football fan, I believe it is my responsibility to chime in on the issue of human trafficking, as described by Change.org:

Every year, children as young as 11 are trafficked involuntarily to Super Bowl cities. There, football fans – usually men, often inebriated – will pay traffickers to have sex with them.
The Texas Attorney General estimates these kids have a life expectancy of just seven years from the time they're first trafficked.

This year, the Super Bowl Host Committee is charged "to engage in responsible planning . . . to ensure the readiness of North Texas to host the first Super Bowl in the Cowboys’ new stadium."

Local anti-trafficking groups have repeatedly offered to help the Committee use its influence to educate fans and the public about the dangers of child trafficking -- which could help to prevent thousands of rapes and abuses at America's biggest sporting event.

But the Host Committee has refused to take meaningful action. And thousands of children will pay the price.

Tell the 2011 Super Bowl Host Committee to take a stand against child trafficking.

In Dallas, a terrific local organization called Traffick911 has created the "I'm Not Buying It" campaign. They've offered the Host Committee free PSAs, posters, banners and informational cards to educate the public and protect children from being abused and raped.

But the Host Committee refuses to display the information.

The Committee is working hard right now to generate good publicity for North Texas and the game, so public pressure at this moment will be especially powerful.

Tell the Super Bowl Host Committee that they have a responsibility to protect the children who'll be trafficked to Texas for the Super Bowl:

http://change.org/petitions/view/ask_the_super_bowl_host_committee_to_stand_up_and_protect_children

After you sign, please forward this information to friends and family to let them know about this crisis, and how they can help. And, click here to share this campaign on Facebook.

This is a simple but important way to let the Super Bowl committees know that fans are watching, and we care about the safety of our children! None of these officials want to see children abused and exploited during the Super Bowl, but we have to help them see that their silence is dangerous and they have the power to make a change. If these prone-to-drink men know the risk, or their friends know what to watch for, they can make choices that keep children safe. Further, this is a chance to bring an understanding the horrors of human trafficking to a whole new audience--to more people who can make a change. Awareness is key!

Should the 2012 season come to be, our city is hosting the Super Bowl. We can get started fighting against this abuse now, let Texas know that Indiana is watching, and do our part to keep children safe. Please sign the petition and spread the word!

awareness vs. activism

art from www.beatplay.wordpress.com

I spend a lot of time learning, building awareness, about what's going on in the world. NPR, New York Times, blogosphere, books, documentaries, you name it. I am aware about a lot more issues than I am actively involved in changing.

But, it is awareness that leads to activism, which leads to change. Activism sounds big and intimidating, but it's really quite simple: taking action towards change, and urging others to do the same. If I had never learned about child slavery, I would have never become a fair-trade activist (and in turn, and anti-slavery activist). If I had never seen the massive inequalities children face in our society, I would never have become a social worker (which is a full-time activist). And so on, and so forth . . .

Of course, no one can be equally involved and passionate about ALL social issues. Some people give their lives to fight for clean water, some people fight for food and shelter for everyone, some people fight slavery, some fight loneliness. All of it is important, and I think each of us should find our passion and dive right in. But what about being integrated, and living our values even in the little things?

I think sometimes awareness feels like activism--watching a gripping movie that teaches us about some social ill makes us feel really smart and compassionate. And while that learning is important, it only matters in so far as it changes us, and in turn, changes society.

So while I spend all day working to make sure children who got an unfair hand have access to everything they need to grow up healthy, I also try to beactive in little ways, like reducing negative impact on our environment, or trying to use my money in ways that make the world better. I think I can call myself a Fair Trade Activist, even though it's not a full time gig. I also have a long way to go . . . I am trying to increase my impact with clean water for all and making my voice heard in a greater variety of justice issues, and I know I can do more. We can be everyday activists--in fact, it's among the most important things we can be! I firmly believe that the world will truly change when all of us make series of small choices that make life better for everyone.

Awareness, yes. But because it leads to activism, and because activism leads to change.

If you're looking to make a difference RIGHT NOW, check out http://www.domaconnection.org/ and give. They are 3 days away from a major opportunity, and they need you!

Double your money! Act now! Operators are standing by!

If you're looking for an alternative Christmas idea, or an organization to give your year-end tax-deductable donation, or if your heart has been stirred by the horrors of human trafficking and the degradation of America's sex industry, or if you want an opportunity to change a woman's life, then I strongly urge you to check out Doma International!

Doma has an opportunity to earn $54,000 before the end of 2010--on condition that they raise $27,000 themselves. If they raise $27,000, a generous donor will DOUBLE it to $54,000! If they raise $26,500, then no match.If you've ever considered giving to Doma, even giving $10, $100, $1,000, or $10,000, now is the time!

With these funds, Doma will be developing their Bloom! house for women who are exiting prostitution and the pain that goes with it, growing firmer roots and reaching toward the sun. The program will provide victim support services in conjunction with the courts and substance abuse recovery. The women learn basic life skills, build healthy relationships, and engage in nurturing activities, all while being surrounded with strong women who care about them and their futures. This program is a part of Project Green Light, seeking to end human trafficking in Ohio, the United States, and the world.

Could this be your first step (or next step) in the modern abolitionist movement?

Could this be your chance to bring this situation to the attention of someone (or some organization) who can make this matching grant a reality?

Do you have questions about prostitution, human trafficking, or Doma?

You can contact me. Or contact Julie Clark, CEO of Doma, Daniel, development director, or Tom English, COO. Or if you're ready to give, head on over to Doma's secure giving site hosted by eTapestry and give to your heart's content.

Could you please share this information with friends, family, and organizations through emails, reposts, links, and even phone calls?

Please don't wait, we only have until December 31, 2010!!

And THANK YOU for your care and concern for women and children, at home and beyond!

Protecting our Children

Prostitution is one of those topics that causes most people to bristle. There's an image that goes with prostitution, and it's usually of a desperate woman trying to make a dollar, sometimes to feed her family, sometimes for a glamorous life, often for drugs. The word 'pimp' has somehow become a hip verb and adjective.

But what if you knew that the average age of entry into prostitution in this country is 12-14? That real pimps are often slick manipulaters who lure vulnerable girls into debt, fear, drug addiction so they can make a buck by renting them out to abusive "customers"? That the young women are held in terrifying circumstances, unable to leave? That many pimps are women? What if you realized that an adult having sex with a minor is a crime, but in many places, if the minor receives money (regardless of who it goes to), the minor becomes the criminal?

Don't believe me? CNN just yesterday busted a story about a huge child prostitution crackdown IN THE UNITED STATES. 884 arrests, 99 of them pimps. 69 children recovered. And that's just one 3-day raid in places like Seattle, Nashville, Detroit.

This ring in particular has been going on for over 10 years. Many of the arrests were of adult prostitutes. How many of those, do you think, were trapped in this lifestyle as children? The day they turn 18, they go from victims (if recognized as victims at all) to criminals.

As long as there are people who will pay to abuse women and children, there will be people who will exploit them to make some money. As long as society turns a blind eye to these horrifying events, they will continue.



So what do we do? Learn as much as we can! Tell our lawmakers that we won't allow people to buy and sell our children while our children pay with their lives. Organizations such as the Polaris Project, Shared Hope, and Free the Slaves are great places to start. Doma International educates communities on the harsh realities of the sex industry. I've worked with them in Ohio, and I'd love to do the same here in Indianapolis. I'm always looking for potential partners. Who's with me? If you, your church, or your communities are interested in learning more about fighting domestic sex trafficking of children, visit http://www.domaconnection.org/ or drop me a note. It's up to us to protect our children.

Fall, Food, and Family

After a few too many work-filled weekends, this weekend was dedicated to enjoying friends and family. I walked a half marathon Saturday with some great friends in the crisp (ok, COLD!) fall air, then hosted my in-laws for the weekend. I am blessed and thankful they are in my family! Sunday, our house was full as my grandmothers, parents, and friends who are like family joined us. Even though I am now home sick without a voice, I feel so much more alive than I would have if I worked all weekend!


We celebrated fall with yummy roasted vegetables and too much dessert. My grandma's granny smith apples were featured players in a homemade apple butter.

5 1/2 c apples, peeled and finely chopped (you can't beat home-grown granny smith!)
2 c sugar*
2 tsp ground cinnamon*
1/4 tsp ground cloves*
1/4 tsp salt

Throw everything in a slow cooker & cover. Cook on high for an hour, low for 9-11 hours, and then uncovered for another hour. Whisk if you want it smoother. That's it! It freezes great, and it is sooo yummy!

*Ideally, you would find fair trade sugar and spices, but I'm sad to say I have been struggling to find them readily available. Any tips, please let me know!

Part of walking humbly, for me, is taking the time to connect to the people I love and honor my roots. In my family, that is done through quality time together and food prepared with care and love. This feeds my soul and makes me a stronger person, all-around--and it allows me to do the same for beautiful people who have given so much in their lives. That is good for me, my family, the children and families I serve, and the world. Thank you to all of the wonderful people who made my weekend!

treating the consumption

It's time for a consumerism fast around here.

A few times, for Lent, we've given up consumerism. We combined trips and used our bikes and the bus more. We remembered to conserve water, gas, and electricity. We watched less TV. We cooked at home and composted and recycled any waste. We donated items we don't need and found new uses for old objects. If we didn't need it, we didn't buy it. Period. Material needs are limited to nutritious food and gasoline to go to work and toilet paper and the like. We make a few mindful purchases, buying fair trade, recycled, organic, and local when we can. The rest, as my husband says, is all gonna burn in the end. We already have more than enough. By deflecting attention from keeping up with our consumerist culture, we have been able to turn our attention to what really matters.

Right now, we're adjusting to new schedules and still catching up from our trip. When we're stressed, easy fixes often overtake wiser, more mindful choices. So, like we do during Lent, we're hitting the reset button and returning attention to our core values.

Are we crazy consumers like some people out there? No. But do we use more than we need? Often. We're American, it's to be expected.

It might seem a little off-base that so many of the links and topics on Just Living concern products and shopping. This is supposed to be about living simply and changing the world in small ways! The fact is, we live in a consumerist culture. Most of us shop way too much, and so often, convenience wins the day, at the expense of justice for so many people. What we buy impacts neighborhoods, resources, health, safety, and dignity for so many people. I can't call myself a justice-minded person if I shop blindly. In a consumerist culture, money is king. Companies will listen to our spending more than they listen to our words. I really believe that if our culture shifts into one of gratitude for what we have instead of constant need to upgrade and acquire more, things will start to change.

While our little week of a consumerism fast may be small, it will impact:

-the environment, as we will produce less waste and manufacturing byproducts while consuming fewer resources; this in turn impacts people around the world
-worker's rights, as we avoid purchasing items made on the backs of exploited people
-our bank account, as we eliminate wasteful spending
-our thinking, as we remember to live with less and address inconveniences creatively
-our spirits, as we feel lighter and freer and have more to give to others

So, here we go again! Anyone care to join us? We'd love to hear your ideas.

And Happy Halloween!

The Joys of Seasonal Eating

We have been LOVING our Green BEAN bin this fall. Squash of all kinds, beets, yams, and apples, all local and mostly organic. We've been revelling in the season! Roasted beets and butternut squash with cheesy polenta = comfort on a plate. Our last scrumptious creation was Roasted Pumpkin-Apple Soup.

We served it with toasted cheddar and arugula sandwiches on Scholar's Inn wheat. We used walnuts, because that's what we had, and added a splash of brandy. SO GOOD! Next fall comfort food: my famous (or should I say infamous?) veggie chili!

What do you love to make in the fall? I'm feeling adventurous, it's time for new fall recipe ideas!